That time I said “What the hell is wrong with you?!” to my girlfriend

Ok,  a brief summary for those just joining:

Two weeks ago, my girlfriend Mona expressed that she can’t be with a man that doesn’t have a job.  One who is eating away at his savings. Which is COMPLETELY understandable. We can’t get more serious if I don’t have a job. She couldn’t introduce me to her kids like this. COMPLETELY understandable. It sucks that I’m giving her the opportunityto say so, but it’s what’s so. She was having doubts about us because of that and because I haven’t picked up side work too.

That was an ugly couple of days but then she got to a point where she’s giving me til the end of the summer to readdress the issue.

Disaster averted. Resume happiness. 

Since then, I’ve applied to Home Depot, Staples, Best Buy. I’ve spoken to two people who I don’t normally speak to for feedback and help. And I’ve interviewed for two full time jobs, one of which went very well. And I have TWO MORE  interviews with them TOMORROW:

One is a discussion with the Head of Client Services (the dept I’m applying for.)

One is an online presentation of one of their products back to them. That’s standard and I’ve done that before. Plus I’ve made hundreds of such presentations in my career. I just need to learn the intricacies of their online research product, which I’ve been doing yesterday and today and planned on doing more of tonight.

Last night,  I had cousins in from out of town.  After a full day of presentation prep I met up with them in East Side Park by the FDR drive to see the fireworks. Unfortunately, my phone  battery was low. Mona knew this. And she started texting me, asking me questions about my 401k, seeing if I hadn’t touched it yet, etc.

I exchanged those texts, answered her questions. I understand she’s concerned, but honestly it couldn’t wait a day or two? I was with my cousins. But I did not say anything to her.

And today was more presentation  practice. I was probably good to go but this is a really important presentation tomorrow so more more more.

Mona and I normally text a bit all evening, just shooting the shit about our day. However, she was very short tonight. “Ok, what’s wrong?”

“I’m having doubts about us (because of my unemployment)” she said.

First of all, she’s TEXTING about that? Not SPEAKING about that?

Second of all, she’s bringing that up NOW? While I’m in mid prep for my interview?  I tell her that and she calls.

And I just lay into her. “You’re telling me this NOW? Like I need more pressure going into this presentation! WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING?!”

She hung up. Fast. I don’t get angry easy, but when I do I explode easily.

Then she still texted about her concerns!

I replied nastily, not believing that she’s still at it, requesting that she act like she cares about me and just WAIT A DAY.

No, not nastily. Just forcefully defending my point.  No curses, no insults.

Ugh! Come on! Throw me a frickin bone here. Yeah, she has her needy tendencies and I tolerate them normally but I just couldn’t take this.

After an hour, she called and apologized.

We’ll still have a confrontation about my situation again. Which I’m not happy about given that she said she’d readdress after the summer. But whatever. If she can’t wait until end of summer,  then let’s do this.


  1. I understand what you are going through. I dont make a lot of $ at my job of 16 years but i cant afford to leave. My ex made twice as much as me, a lifestyle I got used to. The guy I am seeing is a real estate agent and things have been slow for him almost the whole 10 months we have been together . It’s hard enough that I am struggling financially but not good if the guy I’m seeing is as well. We recently had a big talk about that as well as other things. Good luck to you again with all of your interviews and hopefully you get a job offer very soon. I know it’ll help your relationship.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Dearest Rex,

    I love you, I have been following you longer than this Mona has been in your life…not that this fact credits any of my following blatherskite but hey I am still going to confide in you because a good part of me cares for you. As you might know, I am sexist, my generation of women has given me a very sour taste toward them. So reading this I am, for a lack of a better term, acrimonious! 😉

    I understand there is the emotion of love involved in your long-term relationship with Mona, and I get how her feelings and thoughts and person should be respected and acknowledged…however you deserve that too right?

    I got a little worried when I read, “Disaster averted. Resume happiness.”

    You should be doing what makes you happy darling, you are only going to live for like a few more decades (by few I mean like 5 or 6 lol). YOU should be worth more than any struggle for societal valued bullshit. I mean it is just paper…and you after all are a beating heart, a real life, genuine, rare beautiful energy.

    I fear my Master is the same. I actually am up here in Alaska working my ass off to pay off His debts because money bothers Him so. Oh, and please do not share this ha. Money is separating us almost 5,000 miles for 6 months and he is sixty-fucking-five years old…you think he would want to treasure every moment he has left. I guess some people just do not know what real happiness is. And the reason I am sharing my boring current situation with you is because I really think you do know what happiness is and I do not want you to ever divert from it again.

    You deserve a lot more than you give yourself credit for. You do I swear. ha.

    I hope you are having a great day. I missed you whilst fucking around.

    Yours truly,

    ~slave bri

    P.S you speak so open and passionately in your writings, do you practice the same in real life? (Oh, totally not a rhetorical question, I really am curious) 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hey Bri. Thanks for the kind words, my friend. I enjoy our blog relationship too.

      Everything is good. She was absolutely right to be nervous about being in a relationship with a man who has no job. I gotta pull my own weight in the world. I gotta be able to afford the life we want.


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