Relationships

Commitment is spelled I U D

You heard right, Mona got a copper IUD put in today.

image

(Not actually Mona in picture)

Whether she’s making a declaration about her feelings towards me or towards sex in general, it doesn’t matter. It happened.

Historically, I’ve worn condoms every time. (Actually I only wear one at a time, not sure why I said “condoms.”) I’ve always been careful not to impregnate a woman while she, I and WE were not ready to become parents. That was always priority one. And I didn’t want STDs, of course.

Ok except twice.

I think I’ve only had unprotected sex twice, relying on the ol’ “Pull and Pray” technique. And after one of those times,  in 2003, her period came late so pray we did. But the IUD, though I hear it’s the most efficient birth control method available, will be weird.

“What? You afraid of feeling some skin on skin, you wuss?”

No, that’s not the case, Vinny.

Though I hear condoms can break or be put on improperly, I just can’t see how an IUD can be more efficient than a condom, which is basically a wall. Donald Trump wants to build WALL to keep illegal Mexicans out, not an IUD. Walls gotta be tough.

We’ve both been STD tested so we’re clean on that end.

I’ll be overly concerned about her getting pregnant for a while. I’m just so used to the condom I don’t know how to deal with the new freedom.

My Johnson has Stockholm Syndrome.

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20 thoughts on “Commitment is spelled I U D

  1. You can still get pregnant on the iud (I had one of in recently and it was traumatic) however that thing has claws! I’m never going to go get it taken out cause I’m a wuss. There’s a blog post on the somewhere once i actually get over the trauma.

    You’ll be fine. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Have you seen the copper iud? 😉 the shape of it is clawy!

        Not me, but my gyno warned that he has had women get pregnant on it. My mum got pregnant to my sister in hers 🙂 there’s always a chance as nothing is 100% effective.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. I put one in back in September. Some cramping, some bleeding over the months but NO PREGNANCY! And we are verrrrry active. Not saying that in a boastful way but I’m just wanting you to know that you shouldn’t have any concerns! Lol! Enjoy la libertad!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Oh man – no condom sex! It’ll take 3 or 4 minutes off your performance but is SO worth it.
    If you’re positive you don’t want kids of your own, why not go for a vasectomy? Straight forward procedure, minimal complications, and it takes the burden off Mona.

    Liked by 2 people

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