So I have cousins. Two in particular are sisters. Women. One in late 40s, Cindy, one in mid 50s, Mabel. (I’m 43.)
I have a better relationship with Mabel, we’ve met up in the city, had dinner. Infrequently, but still it’s something. She’s corporate so has an understanding of my life. She’s a little too much for me to see too often but occasionally is fine.
Cindy fell on me when I was a kid. Broke her wrist. That has nothing to do with now but still fun to say. Cindy was always a little ditzy and clumsy. Nice otherwise.
I saw them at a mutual cousin’s wake last week. And we were talking about Mona, dating, careers. It was nice. Like adults. So much so that afterwards I texted them individually to say how much I enjoyed talking to them.
Their responses were both positive and had a desire to stay in touch.
But to be clear, both used “keep in touch.” Like when my classmates and I signed each other’s high school yearbooks. “You’re great. Keep in touch (phone number.)
To me, “keep in touch” implies “hey, let’s talk or hang out but YOU have to make the effort.”
Man, eff them. Why would they echoes interest in a relationship only to not put any work in?
Ok maybe I’m being too cynical or just ornery, after all if it said “Let’s keep in touch” that would put the onus on “us.” Or maybe that’s how people react when they receive a text saying that it was nice to talk to them.
We’ll see how this plays out.
Just my initial thoughts – yeah I should probably be in bed π . . .
It would’ve been nice if they would’ve used the word “Let’s,” but they didn’t for whatever reason. Just relish the time you enjoyed with them, make it a good memory to come, & don’t over analyze it right now. AND just because someone doesn’t initiate contact, doesn’t mean they aren’t thinking about ya and wouldn’t love to spend time with you (speaking from experience here – lots!) When it’s all said & done, does it really matter who initiates contact, or who follows through π Who cares who’s driving, as long as your all in the car π Just enjoy the ride!
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It’s such a shame that family can’t try harder to stay in touch. I know that life takes over but it’s so simple to drop a line here and there. Life is short and family is so important. I am always the person to make the effort. Sometimes, you have to be, but it’s worth it in the end.
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Thanks
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You could always respond with something that makes it an “us” thing. Like, “Yeah, you too” or “Right back atcha.”
Family is weird. I don’t know yours personally, but maybe it’s worth giving them the benefit of the doubt. The fact that they said “keep in touch” implies that they’d like further contact. Does it really matter who initiates, when it’s a distant relationship? If you reach out with news or a hello, and it’s not reciprocated, then meh, fuck ’em. But I’m assuming it *would* be reciprocated. And welcomed.
But what do I know? I never wrote my phone number in anyone’s high school yearbook. And I could care less if I never see any of my cousins again.
*shrug*
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Hahaha I hate the phrase keep in touch.
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Thanks. Nice of you to say
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